The milkman.
Don't you fucking laugh or roll your eyes at me.
I'm dead serious.
Read on if you wanna know why I support this theory.
The milkman is really your honey's father. He met her mom and sparked a conversation with her. Before long, however, they had drawn the shutters and were furiously humping away on the couch. When her mom found out she was pregnant, she lied and said the baby was his. Right before your honey was born the "dad" was diagnosed with prostate cancer.
Sadly, he died before he could meet his daughter.
Over time, the milkman watched over his daughter, wishing for the day when he could admit he was the actual father. That day never came, as he was too chicken to do it, but loved the girl as if she really was growing up right beside her. Quite touching, really. When your honey grew into her teenage years, the milkman became very protective of her.
The day you wrote your number down on a slip, she dropped ut as she was going on a date with you. The milkman picked it up and kept note of the phone number. So, when the next day came by and you and your honey were walking past him, your honey said your name. Your name was on the same slip of paper with a heart next to it, and he knew you were officially dating.
But the milkman never liked you, which is why he didn't want you near your honey. He contacted you one date and ordered you to stay away from his daughter. But, your honey thought her dad was dead. So, that's who was phone. See y- dammit, my friend Skeleton just popped out of my closet. I gotta fix him. Bye.